could you grab mr moo while you're at his apt?
you brought your stuffed animal to a booty call?
It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
Handle of 100 proof captain dressed like a pilgrim here we go
Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
my mom just asked if she should wash your furry handcuffs with the lights or darks
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
Just got blown whilst wearing a glow in the dark superman t shirt. Your night will never be as good as mine.
I fully committed to my astronaut costume, to say the least. blacking out on moonshine and having a moonwalk of shame this morning: happy Halloweekend.
this is the last time i am going to a 7am booty call
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
I smell like cotton candy and guilt.
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
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