it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
Signed everyone in my dorm up for free samples of astroglyde. Took me an hour. Happy new years!!!!!
All i have left of him are the magnum X-Large condoms he left in my room, knowing full well that no other guy I hook up with will be able to fill his shoes. He taunts me.
.....woke up with a tube of cinnamon buns in my pocket, i miss you
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
i was beyond wasted so he tucked me into bed and wrapped the blankets around me like a burrito. then gave me a bloody mary and an omlet when i woke up. and who says living with your cousin is a bad thing?!
We fucked in his mom's shower and all I could think about was being too old to be sneak banging while someone's mom was out of town and how much mildew was on the shower curtain. Fuck you, Adulthood.
He motorboated me, gave me a business card that said congratulations on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
Nothing worse then being at the gym on the elliptical next to a guy looking at porn on his phone
I cannot be with a girl who won't let me come home on my lunch break, eat spicy ranch and watch Breaking Bad without pants on. #lesbianproblems
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
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