Drunken candy land NOW. Dont fight the urge... you want to.
I cant date a girl that sucks dick at sucking dick
The university put out a message about those missing salt and pepper shakers... You should at least give back 60 of them.
he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
My goal for tonight: make tomorrow as awkward as humanly possible.
What are the signs of a concussion? Please don't freak out.
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
Thanks for fucking me in last night
TUCKING. TUCKING ME IN LAST NIGHT
actually there are like 49038098 people in the bathroom for no reason. Singing My Heart Will Go On and pseudo fighting.
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
I thought I was really making her scream. Turns out she had a Lego jammed in her lower back.
I need to stop getting so drunk at bowling
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
Randomize
