So... My dad just saw the Plan B package and the beer cans in my backseat.
Oh its cool I'm sure he already knows you're a whore and an alcoholic.
And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
I feel like you just avenged me for every guy who came in my hair
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
Currently bar hopping with 30 Navy SEALS. I know i'm safe but damn its hard to pick up chicks when you feel like a big pussy.
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
It was smashing those cupcakes into my face that did it. Junk food and I don't mix.
Tomorrow, you will get a text, and it will bE spelled right, that's me yo, certify ya soon
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
Dude, I lost my shirt, and my doorknob is gone. I'm not sure which I should find first
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
I wore heels to a golf store in hopes of getting laid. I've hit a new all time low.
I mean seriously, she can have his dick anytime and im over here salivating like a thirsty bitch.
Your sister just admitted to being a " much bigger bitch" than you. So you've got that going for you, which is nice.
I'm just trying to figure out the reason why humans wear socks....
Randomize
