...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
I wish you would always start your sentences with "speaking of my clit..."
maybe next time you'll take an ex boyfriend warning you that she's batshit crazy as a warning instead of a challenge
So he ended up throwing a watermelon that he stole from the cafeteria saying "if i cant have it no one can" of the 5th floor.
I have no idea how I got home or why I am naked but I assume I owe you a thank you...
Dude you took some guys glasses off his face and ran out of the bar
2 things: 1) can you get hep from toilet water? And 2) do you know where we can get a new skillet for cheap?
Please tell me those aren't related.
I made rice.
Oh. My. God. You texted my mom "IM BACK BITCHES!"
Fuck yeah GAYNESS
*explodes into glitter*
I'm only friends with her because I can't stop watching the train wreck.
I just want to bone him one last time before he moves across the country with his new (average looking) girl friend.
I came so hard my ears popped.
Had a moment of weakness, slept with my ex last night
So that's why our room smells like tequila and shame.
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