I'm jealous of your bromance
Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
I just drank Colt45 out of a champagne glass. I feel classy.
Colt 45 out of anything is classy.
Please tell me this is my four loko that I just woke up in....
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
She made me be the little spoon then she pretended to be a jet pack for an hour straight
I walked into the bathroom of the hotel and she's in the bath tub with a guy she met a day ago. They were sharing a shrimp cocktail platter and shot gunning bud lights. Oh and it was noon.
Okay. I am working on pulling a tooth out of my mouth. Call me.
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
I don't get hangovers. Except once. And there is a massively epic story behind that, involving so much alcohol I should have died, and 13 raw hotdogs.
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
He's gonna fuck me, then his girlfriend is going to come over and fuck me in front of him. And they're smoking me out. Happy birthday to ME
I saw his new girlfriend. She was flashing people, short and kinda chubby. I was happy with my life after that.
Randomize
