hitting rock bottom=girl fakes converting to christianity in order to get out of having sex with you.
Your favorite bartender is back from prision
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
the bride spent most of the night apologizing to people she had punched earlier.
Hi Jessica this is Jessica and I am texting you and were taking lime shots and it's fantastic and I broke your elbow and I love you xo
Attempted to dodge my boyfriends cum last night and ended up falling off the bed and getting the worlds most painful charlie horse. fuck my life.
After her AA meeting, she was on the phone with her mom, and when she said, "they're making me start over with Step 1," I quietly sang, "cut a hole in the box".
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
I COULD BREAK CONCRETE WITH MY FOOTBALL ERECTION.
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
If you can't seal the deal with her, I will. And you know I'll be successful. So there's your incentive
Please tell me I didn't send you a dick pic in the middle of Peter Pan..
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
I trusted a fart in Toronto. NEVER TRUST A FART IN TORONTO.
Randomize
