He came through my line today and bought designer impostor perfume, just for men gel, and astroglide. I almost DIED.
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
I knew I fucked up when I woke up with the meat scissors in my hand.
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
My roommate took my designated hickey removing spoon out of the freezer.
My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
I got so drunk last night that I drunk texted myself. "hand jobs are the currency of the future"
If there was a tv show called "True Life: My 58 Year Old Dad Rolls Better J's Than Me" I'd be on it.
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
I need a life alert for his random dick pics. My heart can't handle that.
I got my period on eclipse day. I'm officially in line with the moon.
Do you just want me to shit in a Jack-o-latern
Randomize
