So she said grabbing my cock was like holding a giant crayola from pre-school.
that was the beginning of the end.
I think "bars open christmas minneapolis" is the saddest google search i've ever done.
For future reference, when you see people who look like Rosie O'donell, do not tell them they look like Rosie O'donell.
I'm making celebratory pizza rolls. They're a lot like regular pizza rolls, but without the taste of shame.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my wrists were so small for the handcuffs, i could slip them off and hand the tow truck driver my keys....
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
There is a girl in my drunk limo who hasn't seen an uncircumcised penis. Hook me up with a picture.
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
I walked by the two of them and mouthed "fuck me" based on there reaction I think they just came in their pants
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You need to get laid. You spent last night stumbling through the club pulling couples apart and telling them to leave room for Jesus.
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Magyver!
Woke up to I'm AWESOME written in purple crayon all over my walls. I love drunk me
He spent three years trying to get a chance with me and finally broke me down. then he came in two minutes and was so upset he locked himself in the bathroom so I helped myself to his weed and left. Wanna get stoned?
He got mad at you last time bc you tried to rap battle him via text. This is strictly business.
Randomize