Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
She was lying in bed moaning while eating a Snickers and masturbating.
i'm sorry if your life is a sore subject
i had a dream that i had so much marijuana that i didn't know what to do with it. i woke up and cried.
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
I feel like I'm full of double a batteries and cocaine.
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
You might be at the point of severe desperation when you gotta hold the two pieces of your broken vibrator together just to get off.
Don't forget Giraffe in your car! If we show up in the same outfit without animal heads we're just gonna look weird.
ok NEVER tell the strippers its your birthday. i think i have to burn these clothes and take a bath in bleach
You keep talking about hotdogs and yelling "COME ON DOWN, LET ME SEE WHAT YOU'RE WEARING"
Haha! I swear, it's like I'm talking to Buddha with a slutty agenda. You are so full of wisdom.
He wouldn’t know a good thing if it bit him on the ass. Which, btw, I did.
Randomize
