is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
It only takes once for you to drunkly piss on a chick for her to lose interest in you.
I just got my inseam measured in raffle tickets by a drag queen. Being fondled for charity is awesome.
Hold on there are flying pancakes I can't handle this right now
Tell me again your tentative move date. There are 5 Russians in my apartment on ecstasy and they are having a rave in my living room. I can't. I need to move stat
GOOGLE HAS JUST RELEASED AN UPDATE THAT ALLOWS YOU TO CATCH POKEMON USING MAPS. Pack your shit, our time has COME.
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
Fell asleep on kitchen floor again, chicken nuggets everywhere.
It's my birthday weekend! I'm getting a Brazilian and he's going to fucking Arkansas. Where the fuck are his priorities?
Fuck it, i havent messed around in half a year. I have sexual tension with a fire hydrant.
the guy next to you kind of looks like a penguin. i'm going to fuck him
So today was the first day i've been sober since Wednesday according to my roommate!
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