I've decided that life's journeys are more fun when your moral compass hangs in front of you and swings with each step
It was kind of weird
What did your mom walk in?
She flung her tampon across the room.
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
she refused to get out of the dog cage till we sang "be our guest" to her.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
your mom just called me and asked me why i'm not in jail with you right now.
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's not really the holidays until I raid the medicine cabinet. Happy hydrocodone to me
And a merry methadone to all
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
I snuck out three pillows from the hotel i was rolling so hard. They are like little clouds. I regret nothing.
He said he'd prefer a photo rather than discuss politics, I sent him a snapchat "conservative shorts 4 conservative man". He said "be liberal"
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
I need to find a divorced guy with a boat and let my tits do the talking
Randomize