i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
There isn't a single transaction on my online bank account that doesn't involve drugs or alcohol since November 12
Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
how do you tell someone you stalk them in a non-creepy way
you don't.
I had to drink heavily last night because I needed to forget that you told me you want to blow my dad.
Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.
If we worried less about pouring champagne down stripper crack, we probably wouldn't skip so many meals.
Look. If you get me out of this speeding ticket you can bang my sister. Or my mom. But not both.
We walked in and someone handed her an unopened bottle of jack with her name on it. She's like a drunken celebrity.
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
I had a dream he was standing in front of me naked and flexing while yelling VICTORY and gizzing all over the floor.
You're a goddess. Probably of destruction and dick jokes, or some shit, but man, lesser bitches wish they could be half as fab.
Somehow his homemade liquor activated memories of my semester abroad three years ago. I ended up yelling random medical advice in German, while my roommates played dress-up with the cat stoned out of their minds. I consequently gave up on dating. Back in the ONS game.
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
Randomize
