I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
it only takes four glasses of wine for me to ride an elephant with a stranger.
I just tried to light a cigarette with a tube of lipstick. If I had stayed in girl scouts maybe I could've made that happen.
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Chances are I'll be there for your wedding. Camelbaks filled with jack and coke are appropriate attire, right?
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
Everything's a blur with pockets full of jello
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
This is the fourth day in a row I woke up with cheetos spread around me in a ritual pattern..this weed is unreal
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
SHE MASTURBATED TO THE THOUGHT OF ME HAVING AN ALL DUDE THREESOME WITH HER EX BOYFRIENDS.
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
Randomize