That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
I found a map from his room to his bathroom this morning in my purse. Apparently I was too fucked up to get there without one.
i think i pulled off the nice guy thing too well. it just backfired later on when she thought i was actually nice.
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I showed remarkable dignity in such a compromising situation. Except I came off as sort of a blue ball giver.
Dude I broke my bong in half this morning. I kicked it as I was jerking off. I would never hide anything from you.
Let me start this apology by saying I'm sorry that I bit your penis.
your like the ambassador to my penis.
we didn't have anything to do and wanted to get our money's worth out of our costumes, so if you see two mermaids day drinking by the creek it's us
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
Matt and I's climactic adventure has ended with Matt being hauled off to jail. And now his brother and I are having lunch and a beer.
We can't go out this weekend. My uterus is so desperate it's given me permanent beer goggles
They offered me pot brownies in 7 minutes flat. Imagine my horror when I had to be like, are those gluten free?
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
My drunk is wearing off and im starting to feel like this dolphin tattoo was a bad idea.
Randomize