At what point did I decide it would be a good idea to fill my contact case with vodka
what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
I pissed myself at the bar so I threw away my wet underwear and kept partying... you act you've never done that before
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
Just missed the last train for another 5 hours. There are balls in or around the mouth of my life.
THEY AREN'T MARRIED. PUT ON YOUR HOMEWRECKING PANTIES AND GET TO WORK. NO EXCUSES.
Sex obviously provides more sustenance than oatmeal.
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
don't judge but I think I'm gonna go fuck a dad this weekend
Woke up at my x's house. He said I talked about how much I love panda's for fourty five minutes. Then made him watch The Little Mermaid with me. Made the walk of shame infront of his mom. Things can only really go up from here.
Wait till you get home.
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before
You left me with 12 red bulls and a bottle of vodka. What did you expect?
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
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