I want to buy you liquor! I want to kiss your face.
i should write a book entitled 'the joys of being sexually objectified'
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
He was carrying a rolled up carpet saying he was saving it for tomorrow's Walk of Fame.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
My lips are red and swollen. Solid proof that giving head is a viable alternative to lipstick and plumper.
Going to the market. I need some nachos and a serious re-evalution of my life.
You don't understand. He was so ginger that he could make red hair a dominant gene. And I refuse to torture my future spawn like that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, you chugged an entire bottle of tomato sauce and got us free drinks for the night. No way was I gonna stop you.
The thing is that despite the high paying career and the increased responsibility, my life hasn't changed that much. Only instead of blacking out on $2 wells at some dive I blackout on top shelf martinis in a suit. Oh and only on Fri & Sat nights. Being 30 doesn't suck as bad as everyone led me to believe.
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
It's 10:15 on a Wednesday night and my dick is covered in pop rocks. How's your Wednesday going?
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
I hope Trump leaves Planned Parenthood alone for at least another month. The week got away from me. #whorelando
Randomize