i literally forgot his name and just started calling him "waffles"
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
me and this guy in my office just exchanged an "i saw you at a drag show last night" look as he passed by my desk.
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
Things we need. Powerade. Water in fridge. Mixers for vodka. And reality checks.
Less talking, more tequila
Well, I looked over and you and him were each making out with a fireman. And then you switched. And you probably spent an hour like that.
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
Listen, everyone has a price and mine is free taco bell.
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
I was wondering why he was in my phone as "Cat Guy", he seemed pretty normal. Then when we woke up he was wearing a shirt with a picture of his cat on it. The name stays.
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
Do you not realize that being Batman fulfills about 95% of my non-sexual fantasies?
Randomize
