Imagine if sharks could walk on land...scary.
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
i just ate an entire onion plain. all alone. i have never felt more single in my life
I DON'T CARE WHAT THE CIRCUMSTANCES ARE NEVER VOMIT IN MY PURSE AGAIN.
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
i need to stop celebrating other people's birthdays like they are m own.. my body can't handle a birthday every week
Well Apparently I went to piss out my window last night, woulda been ok if I opened the window or the blinds.
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
Remember that time I got suspended in eighth grade, well it was like that but I was on acid and wearing goggles
Okay so I'm high eating chili cheese fries bra-less watching Mulan, could I be doing any better at life right now?
No feeling is better than coming home from your booty call and putting on a fresh pair of granny panties
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
...blackout vacation is awesome. Where did you end up? I think i'm in Miami.
Hospital.
Randomize
