But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
does the new i-phone have a pregnancy test app?
she has no idea who harrison ford is.
see that's why i'd never date someone born in the 90s
did you know delaware is a STATE? HOLY CRAP! i didn't till i was hitting on this chick and asked her when she said she was from delaware, which state that was in. crazyness
Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
Hey, could you leave the door unlocked? Keys seem hard right now.
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
It was just a squirrel
You act like its normal to see a squirrel in the bar
I know your texting costs money, but I'll pay for it if you consider this. Oversized frozen jello shots. I'll buy everything needed if you approve. Let me know
Can I please come dance in my bra to destiny's child with you? I'll bring the wine and the glitter
I learned that I order a bunch of dollar shots at the bar and once it's ready turned around and say "who wants pay?" And someone will pay
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
I don't think anything is more terrifying than the thought that you might shit your pants in front of your boss
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
I think I may have fully transcended this spectrum of life. I can see beams of light man. Down to the photons
What
The only downside is I can't stop skipping
Randomize
