I'm wearing a childsize birthday hat and a bib. I am the def of sex appeal rite now
i'm going to be one of those im-wearing-a-shirt-as-a-dress girls today. dont make fun of me, i need laid
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just had the fat girl at the party come tell me I look sad and offer me a beer. I'm out.
I'm sitting in class drinking a forty out of a paper bag. No ones said anything yet. I think my professor is trying to ignore me. Better start yelling louder.
We're official. Living with your boyfriend sounds so much better than fucking your roommate.
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
His bookmark is a piece of toilet paper. No shame there.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it possible to get a DUI in a wheelchair that's not yours?
I learned 3 things lastnight....1. Turkeys are related to the t-rex. 2. Whales have leg bones cause they used to walk. 3. I will sing drunk in the waffle house, but not during karaoke in the bar
It was like die hard. Except with more penises.
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
I went from naked with lasts nights hookup to Ihop in 6 minutes flat
I think that's a new house record
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
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