i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
i don't really know how much tequila is too much
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
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I dunno... But she calls vodka "dancing juice"
Stop inviting me to your birth control calender reminders...my job is to test its effectiveness, not know its schedule
Lmao sorry
Oh my god. He likes it up the butt. But loves womanly support. Omg. Its bad. Its bad. Ive had too much whiskey for this to be ANYthing except bad.
Had a guy offer me a shot. But he wimped out when I asked for tequila and instead ordered gummi bear shots. I don't think he has balls. I didn't stick around to find out.
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
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I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
What happened last night? I just woke up and there's like 15 mcflurry cups on the floor
You don't remember stealing them?
You're a problem for me, dick game too good. In the future when I'm with someone I actually wanna to date, now I'm gonna compare.
Ahhh, the bane of our relationship.... His mediocre penis
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