How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
he just sent me a friend request on facebook. i wish it were physically possible to vomit on him through the internet.
dude, never take two tylenol pm and smoke three bowls. i feel like i'm covered in cold ants.
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
He told me he was 'pondering the natural wonder that is my ass'
Like, dude. I'm already fucking you, you don't need to wax poetic.
Isn't he wasted enough that he might actually mean it and not just be trying to get you to fuck him without a condom?
Soo I got blood taken today and when the doctor came back with the results she said "you aren't sick but the tests show that you are currently drunk..."
He was going down on me as I discovered a spaghetti-O on my boob. Its been a while since I faked it.
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
Nothing quite like walking through a spider web on your way back in from smoking to fuck up a perfectly good high.
Not many people can say they've been photo bombed by an antelope. I sure did.
i let a mormon finger me. i don't ever want to be that drunk again.
Good Morning! You are sterile right?
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
Randomize
