hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
I can't believe you just thanked me for a blowjob on my Facebook wall...
Ate apple sauce off his penis. Nutritious and slutty.
If she makes a move, pretend to have a seizure.
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
Ok I have to ask, whose idea was it to used crushed up norcos as margarita salt? And what did they say to convince everybody else to think it was a good idea?
What's the address?
Too drunk. Just google it.
IT'S YOUR HOUSE
Drinking Patron always ends with me puking or receiving anal. So make your move when I start ordering it.
Her ex wouldn't stop texting her so she started replying with various pictures of Britney spears's breakdown
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
Let's just say I peed the bed last night, and I wasn't in it alone. Whoooops
The high school classes are online, not my sex life. He still comes over for “teacher / parent conferences.” A couple more “conferences” and I’ll be able to rewrite the Sex Ed curriculum
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