Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
There is something just so refreshing and wonderful about an uninterrupted morning poop in the office.
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
Woke up naked in another mans house. If that keeps happening, then I probably need to go gay. You know to make it ok.
or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her.
The vomit I understand but how is there seaweed in my bed?
OMG stoned with flashing lights behind me, I was freaking out until I realized I wasn't driving my couch
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
The kid that passed out is still in the bathtub filled with ice and the empties
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
I realized I was totally the dude in that hook up. I came first and didn't wanna help him finish. And he had paisley sheets.
drunk grocery shopping was not as bad of an idea as i thought, this salmon cat food tastes a lot like tuna
I just smoked weed out of a baked potato.
You rock my world.
Vibrator fell off the top of the dresser and hit me. This might be the most embarrassing black eye incident ever
So you broke your ribs while fucking? Dude you just got about 25% hotter.
Randomize
