no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
woke up with 15 BAGS of hot dog buns in my passenger seat... jameson strikes again
Just think, if your stepsister would've gotten knocked up 2 years earlier, she could've had a TV show. What a bitch.
He kept buying me shots of tequila. I decided to just save myself the half hour of toilet hugging and tell him straight up that I intended on sleeping with him. We got Tacos on the way home with all the money we saved.
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
She just sucked the buffalo sauce out of my beard. I've never been so disgusted and hard in my life.
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
Convinced the domino's pizza delivery person to go to shaws and buy me a bottle of wild turkey. For america.
Sorry blacked out and lost my phone. Judging by the looks of my body I fought a cat and fell into a bush.
He told me to tell my ass that he loved and missed it, and even though he hasn't known it long, it might be the one for him
Dude I just clenched/unclenched my hindquarters while looking in the mirror I have fucking talent
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
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