What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
I hate drunken dyslexia, i thought she said "someone to do" not "something to do" long story short i now have a restraining order.
Also, I think I'm too drunk to be at the gym right now. But how sober do you need to be for IM volleyball?
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
Good news. Hiccups are gone. Bad news. I had to set the bathroom rug on fire to get rid of them. Don't come home until the fire truck leaves.
He could stay over, if you'd just ask.
Yeah. What am I supposed to say? "Oh, my couch is occupied, but my vagina's not"
Guess who was PASSED OUT ON A BMW. I shit you not
Stop it right now
This time face forward
A few days ago I apparently came up, asked her to make me soup, and handed her a can of coconut milk.
I just paid for weed by taking him to the store to buy cheese so he could make empanadas. Best. Drug deal. Ever.
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
Hungover on St. Patrick's Day. I did this backwards.
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
Plan before tomorrows interview: wash off green glitter from EVERYWHERE!!!
Randomize
