ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
is there anything more depressing than unpacking condoms from your suitcase that you thought you were going to use on vacation?
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
I just had a dream where Bob Saget recognized me from when I hung out with him in a dream I had months ago.
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
No more margaritas for you. Also, tequila should be reclassified as a hallucinogen.
YOU CAN'T JUST ADD EVERYONE WHO ENTERS MY VAGINA ON FACEBOOK WTF
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
Randomize
