brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
Haven't eaten in 11 hrs. I am gonna have so much material to talk about with anorexic girls now
Seriously, I'm delusional. Idk how these models even walk on the runway
I just watered my plants with apple juice. Look what you made me do.
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
Congratulations!! You are the WINNER of a brand new BLOWJOB!! You can collect your prize between the hours of 12pm and 1pm today, anywhere you'd like!!! :)
All I've had today is a brownie and a shot of Jack, so you know. I'm doing ok.
This bitch rocks a fuckin fanny pack and still manages to lose her phone at every thirsty thursday
Whatever dude, just dont tell her your first impression was she looked like your cousin. no judgement here. just sayin.
Def over. He sent me a nude selfie but cropped it right above his junk. Total Silence of the Fucking lambs looking.
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
There was one thing about my NYC trip I forgot to tell you: I took a dump in Trump Tower
I am literally so hung over that I just opened up my emergency kit, got out a survival meal replacement bar and ate it.
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
Randomize
