turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
Sometimes I kiss girls just to make them shut up.
Preparing for wine wednesday. How would you feel about improvising and starting a white russian wednesday tomorrow instead? you know, shake things up a bit.
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
Have you ever chugged beers in the hospital parking garage with your mom?
Just tell your mom you have to go somewhere half naked with a strange man. She'll understand
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
I fell into his fridge. I want to leave.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just quit my job so I could get dick this weekend. I'm pretty sure my need for dick is much more important than the customers' needs.
His cat kept scratching my feet while we were having sex. There's only room for one pussy around here. It also concerns me that he owns a cat.
idk wtf was in that bud but I was talking to my dead dog last night bro holy shit
I'm very impressed by your ability to explain a story about your fiery snatch solely in emojis. props.
It's a long story, but I accidentally peed on my dog. I'll tell you about it tomorrow, and we shall never tell my wife.
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
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