No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
I knew my chances of getting laid had increased after she walked into my room and yelled "DICK TIME"
I don't know where my bra went.
Welll you ran into the street, took it off and yelled "I'm a free woman!". And then you threw it at some homeless guy.
I woke up to ritz crackers on the lawn, a keystone behind the hedge and puke on the rental car... i think that we have become that house...
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I'm lying on the floor in the back room praying my boss doesn't come to work today.never again
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
Find a vagina and bring it to me. Like feeding a tiger.
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We have your weave and dirt in our room.
Do you remember ripping my condom off last night while yelling "I DEMAND MY MEAT RAW" like a Viking?
Vodka and cigarettes aside, my body is a temple.
Halloween: the only night of the year wheee the more high I get, the more it compliments my makeup and outfit.
Hypothetically - think of it as Schrodinger's blow-job.
Sorry i ignored you for so long. I think my vibrator is broken.
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