it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
They should try giving mcdonalds to cancer patients because it just cured the worst hangover ive ever had
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
He's crying and calling me out on using him. It's awful. And I'm too drunk to leave.
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
He told him to "throw up in my mouth like I'm a baby bird."
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
I can't be here...my therapist just watched me take tequila shots
Let us rub each other in fish scales and become mermaids
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog.
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
hey, so i dont know your name. but im guessing we had sex last night. seeing that you're in my phone as "had sex time thursty thursday guy"
Ok fell asleep on a bus in south Carolina just woke up in Canada where the hell is the liquor store from here?!
Randomize
