Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
I'm pretty sure my roommate has taken plan B more times than i've had sex. Not sure how that makes me feel.
i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
his tattoo said carpe diem which i thought was ironic considering his epilepsy
27 Of The Most NSFW Life Hacks
it took you forty minutes to realize it was a gay bar.
there is a strobe light in my taxi. in what way is this safe.
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
he just texted me saying he needs a place to stay for the night. pretty sure i just got booty called to my own house...
I live vicariously through you. No one mistakes me for a hooker anymore. I look like a stay at home mom of three. On bad days of four.
23 Disturbing Small-Town Horror Stories
My pants are like a grocery bag containing ONLY jelly beans right now.
If we had kids we couldn't come home, get high and watch porn together. And that's like the only reason I get up in the morning
Dude hobos go hard. I learned a lot last night.
I was looking for a pen and I stumbled upon my mom's vibrator. On a related note, yes I will be going out tonight.
I was too lazy to get my chapstick out of my purse so i lubed up my lips with pizza grease. On a scale of 1-10 how embarassed should i be?
MY LIFE IS A TRAINWRECK THATS ON FIRE BUT SOMEHOW STILL MOVING, I HAVE THE RIGHT TO SCREAM OUTSIDE AT 2AM