There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
We pulled over so he could pee and the next thing I know he's running down the hill by himself with his pants down
Let's paint friendship bongs
I have got to stop making out with redheads. I need to sign my life over to my dad like Britney Spears.
No it's okay, we're just driving to random places with the portable stripper pole and causing a ruckus.
Oh that's normal
Also I legit had a girl at my bar crying tonight saying to her friend "why did he have to take his top off ?"
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
He's like the unplanned child of drunkenness
some people popped out of a houseboat and asked us to their party. their houseboat IS A WEEDBOAT. it is full of weed they grow weed. EVERYWHERE.
I'm to the point where I'm fantasizing about Iron Chefs going down on me.
I thought 5 times was beyond my capabilities but her tongue was like a penis defibrillator. Clear!
I'm serious-it was like trying to deep-throat a minivan.
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
Like did he really think I just hit him up for dick !? It's 11:30 am , these ain't hoe hours
Randomize
