you keep denying me to hang out, should i take a hint?
you keep asking me after midnight, should i take a hint?
If he can handle my muffin top then I can handle his front teeth.
...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
I'm on the bus going to class. And a cop just rolled by and I got nervous because I didn't have my seatbelt on. I have to stop smoking so much weed.
This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
No. No. And hell no. If you are driving a Honda Fit you are not allowed to give me a dirty look. No.
I just had to beg some random guy to help me climb through your porch window since the door was locked. FYI...i hear you having sex in there. You could of at least taken a break to unlock the damn door. WTF!!!
Guys always stop talking to me right around the point that if they bought me food a couple times I would probably have sex with them.
I knew there was a problem when things got heated and instead of rushing home I offered to get bagels instead
That was right around the time that the drunken mess pulled out his dick in front of myself and like 10 other people and started peeing all over the train platform while saying, "Sometimes a bear gets you brother. Sometimes a bear gets you."
Pretty standard Thursday night commute for you, no?
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
I'm still very high. To be blunt. No pun intended.
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