no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
maybe i'll make good life choices and keep my legs closed. periodically txt me friday and saturday night saying "baby carrot round 2" that should stop me.
If I ever mention marriage force me to Brazil to do coke and strippers until I die.
wanna tell me why theres a glass of water stuffed with tamptons in the freezer?
This weekend has taught me that sometimes, being buried under a mattress is the safest place in the room.
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
Went home with a male stripper who looked like Justin Timberlake.. I started singing cry me a river mid sex. When he sang along I fell in love
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
Wish me luck. My vagina needs it.
May his noodley appendage touch you.
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
Does the girl you just banged want anything from Taco Bell?
I found my parents stash of sex toys. You know my green one? My mom has it...in purple. I HAVE THE SAME VIBRATOR AS MY MOTHER
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