Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What's the appropriate way to phrase "If you ever leave your wife give me a call. But we can still have sex periodically until then."??
You threw up with your ski mask on still.
Yeah dude. Pulled out the couch and a bird flew at me. Please tell me who put a bird in my house.
Simple math equation: Up till 5 a.m. drinking + up at 9 a.m. for nephews birthday party = puking in the pool
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have to estimate how long it takes them to get to the bedroom so that I can sneak out of my room and get snacks. If she's anything like me, they're in bed the second he gets here and I can get snacks now
You declared your undying love to a drag queen, then proceeded to puke into the poor man's purse.
Go forth my friend, but don't do any of that fruitful and multiplying shit.
Nobody wants to date "Eats Taco Bell Secretly In Her Car" Girl
If you had a dick, I would hope it falls off and comes back to haunt you while fucking your ears at night. But you don't. But if you did, that's how mad I am at you
Ever been to a strip club with one stripper? I have. And she sucked.
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