I'm bringing in a picture of a stranger on facebook to get my haircut. I have reached a new level of creepy.
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
he keeps trying to sext me and all I can do is respond with descriptions of what im eating.
I hope he says my name when they're having anniversary sex this weekend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
i mean, i offered you kinky, jungle themed sex. i don't know what else you want from me
Now if u will excuse me I have to go prep my vagina for this amazing sex filled weekend I'm about to encounter
Girl, he can't tell you not to take a bump just because you work tomorrow. You're on a wedding diet, remember?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is there a reason there's a dick print on my seventh-story window?
I just threw up in my front yard because my roommate was in the bathroom. Fuck New Years Day.
Literally just inhaled three cinnamon rolls. Sara is staring. It was inhuman
It's 90 percent alcohol, and 10 percent a whisper that says "get drunk"
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
He wouldn’t know a good thing if it bit him on the ass. Which, btw, I did.
Randomize