what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
I don't know why girls would even talk to someone as drunk as I was.
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
The night started going down hill when she shot the cashier in the face with the confetti gun we bought at 711.
I think if it were a part of everyone's daily routine, the world would be happier. International Finger Yourself While Bathing Day.
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
BECKY! ITS ANDY FROM LAST NIGHT WITH THE PILL
Andy, Sorry you have the wrong number. But good luck with Becky!
I don't give a fuck that he's gay and keeps hitting on me. Free cocaine is free cocaine bro
So red wine goes with eggs, right? Because that's all I have in the house to cook and the drinking options are either wine or scotch
Ya know, one would think a restraining order would keep me from fucking my ex.
Thank you for being so charming, but do you have syphilis?
Randomize
