we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
On a scale from 0 to 24...wait, 3 to 24, where 6 is the lowest and 12 is the highest, how freaking high re you right now?
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
Seriously, do normal people actually get work done being this hungover? No wonder the economy's in the shitter
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
bring the dog... nobody goes to jail with a dog.
High me just had to pick the lock on my sisters room because I locked my vodka in there. I love vacation.
There are more dirty dishes in my bed then in the kitchen. Have I lost at life?
Yeah. I woke up in an awkward three way spoon with him and his sister. Tequila!
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
We need a kiddie pool and lots of cornstarch
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
Someone should walk up to them and say, "We're sorry, you're too hot to be out here with the other humans."
Randomize
