I find it ironic that homeless people are so good in bed
I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
So he didn't pull out. And I like flipped out. And the he told me to chill and opened up a drawer full of packs of Plan B and handed me one.......
Now go wash the fat girl off your hands.
Ya,, he does have virgin eyes. Thats a real thing you know...
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
Picking up hoes with my dad is going to make it a little harder, but ay, if thats how he wants to bond after 23 years, Ill give it a shot
ps I'm eating candy off our sex sheets. gotta say the only thing better than sweet tarts is sweet tarts with a hint of sex. perfect post vday situation
Remember that girl that we found passed out in the dorm study room under a pile of money and jimmy johns wrappers? She's standing right on front of me.
Can you rollerblade?
No, why?
Honestly, I was high and picturing us roller blading together. I wanted to see if I could make my dreams a reality.
Dude, there are some things that you can't un-see. Her, beached on a dog bed, is one of them.
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
I'm sittin in my Hawaiian shorts watching the office eating cold asparagus. wow do I suck when you're not here.
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
Randomize
