So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
She made fun of how I walked so I announced to her boyfriend that I have cum on her face before.
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
My uncles bleeding, my brother has a black eye and my moms topless in the pool... How was your family cookout?
Im pretty sure you told the waiter at Dennys last night to take your pants off or show a nipple.
I have 4 passes to the spa here, walking around with a robe on and putting cucumber slices on my penis. You guys should come hang out here. It's very relaxing
Also I'm sitting home alone with a big ass bowl of marshmallows right now just eating. It's so sad.
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
AT THIS RATE YOU WILL HAVE FUCKED MORE OF MY CLOSE FRIENDS THAN I HAVE PEOPLE PERIOD BY VALENTINE'S DAY.
Just skate-of-shamed, shirtless, with a bucket or margaritas. Good luck beating that one.
I seriously doubt I'm gonna be able to properly put your dick in my mouth whilst upside down, but I'm willing to give it my best shot
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
I dunno what to tell you sport. Short of having a shock collar on, you're gonna wanna hook up with people.
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