I need a shot of tequila, and quick death
Well the bottom line is that I had to completely coat my testicles in Neosporin.
He won't talk to me. He'll only communicate using scissors
You are the sheppard guiding my vagina away from horrible decisions.
we were on a sandy mattress. i was wearing a sweatshirt with a poodle on it and eating a whopper jr. i wouldn't have fucked me either.
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
I used to not like fucking fat girls but with her gut clapping against her boobs, its like a standing ovation ever time.
We could make it cute. Like "oh those two cute lesbians who are about five foot two who sell the cocaine down the street. You know the ones? With the Yorkies?"
Yep I can make a seagull sound. It's identical. I tried it. They thought I was talking to them. It's pretty cool.
I asked him if he wanted a pillow, and he replied "No. Batman never had pillows."
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
Did I hit my head yesterday? I have a bump on the back of it. Also I just want you to know that I don't blame you for me taking my bikini top off. If I want to be shirtless no man or woman on this earth can stop me.
I'm pretty sure NORMAL roommates don't have to hide each others sex toys from their fuck buddies.
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
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