I just woke up and found a naked man on my floor. Looks like Dad had a wild night of strip poker
i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
dude your girlfriend is running naked down the hall with a raw chicken taped to her stomach saying this is what I'll look like pregnant...run far far away
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
Pretty sure God shed a tear when I put 15 singles in the collection plate.
i left because you were standing at the top of the stairs throwing shot glasses and bottles full of alcohol at me and yelling JAGERBOMBS
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
you should have walked with me to my car. you just missed a girl rip off her bra and throw it into a dumpster and scream mardi gras
When you went off to sleep with that guy that looked like a dirty Jesus and I asked why all you had to say "trying to keep Christ in Christmas" and left. The Vatican called, you're going to Hell.
Liar. My heart is broken and my boobs are disappointed.
you never un-have a 4some
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
I havent moved from the couch and I'm licking peanut butter from a spoon, I'm a beautiful person.
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