sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
college drinking is stealing all my money, thank god planned parenthood is somewhat free
i'm at a baby shower....never been happier to not be having sex currently
I came out of bedroom with my jeans on backwards, zipped AND buttoned. I have inconceivable talents whilst intoxicated.
You asked my mom "who the fuck drives four hours to sleep in a guys bed and not touch his penis"
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
well I was pissed. first he yelled at me for having my own condoms, then he got mad when they didn't fit him. Dude, I only fuck magnum men.
I did the mature thing and subtweeted that bitch. She follows me so she'll see.
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
I just hit on a guy in a doughnut store... is that too suggestive?
THEY AREN'T MARRIED. PUT ON YOUR HOMEWRECKING PANTIES AND GET TO WORK. NO EXCUSES.
Things I have learnt this week: bubble mix is toxic. Extremely toxic.
I can already feel the hangover I'll be having on New Year's Day. I don't know if I'm prepared for this.
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
Randomize