He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
Scary. I thought trees were a lie and that someone ha permanently stenciled them into my life. No joke.
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
You know what's even more awkward then buying plan b from someone who is a member at the gym you work at... When they come in after that day and have that look of recognition
I told him I was on the pill and it was OK to fire away. I want to never have to wear panty house or ever go to an office again. This is my early retirement plan. I want half of his NBA money.
You fucked that MILF against my car!
How would you know?
She scratched her name into my window with her bigass wedding ring. btw she wants you to call her
Literally too hungover to pull out of the driveway. Tried 3 times and failed. I'm going back to bed.
I just had to explain to an 70+ year old lady what 'coitus' was. This was not in my job description.
I have this theory that your highest awareness of how drunk you are is while you're sitting on a toilet
Help I can't tell if I'm sexually attracted to Bill Nye
Oh.
You came to the right person.
Randomize
