Omg. Never. Take a laxative the day you are going on. A date.
question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
I think they were cool with it, they should have know if I was the host of the baby shower it was going to involve a keg and jager shots.
I'm standing in the shower drinking with the light off and a candle lit, listening to Amy Winehouse. Be proud.
See this is why people shouldn't jump into marriage. See what type of drunk you're engaged to first.
No im the worst roommate ever. Just dump a bucket of water on my head at 8am so i can suffer like i deserve to.
A blow job from a tiger shark would still entail less risk to your genitals than having sex with her.
if you fuck our toilet off the wall again, i'm going to be so mad.
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
Apparently "I licked it so now it's mine" doesn't apply to people
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
Randomize
