dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
Hey man, did I leave the bottom drawer to my refrigerator that I had beer in at your house by any chance?
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
The great thing about skinny blondes is that they're all interchangeable.
Call me next time you want to get irresponsibly drunk when we have grown up things to do the next day.
She's an honest to god fucking ballerina. She did things I don't have names for.
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
i showed up sober to class for the first time. my prof said that i was "off my game today". i love philosophy
Mainly I just wanna pet bunnies. And purple chicks. Well any color chicks if I close my eyes. But purple if I open them.
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
Do you think there are two dudes living in an apartment somewhere that go to the store and call it Brocery shopping?
Oh god...probably.
I don't know what the bubonic plague feels like- but I'm gonna guess its something like this.
Just heard a 15 minute program on the radio about how cases of gonorrhea in the throat and rectum are skyrocketing in the US. Almost crashed laughing so hard.
Sorry, who is this??
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
Randomize
