i woke up with socks on this morning
so?
i didnt wear socks last night
look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
just had to sit in the middle of an aisle in stop and shop because we're too hungover and needed to take a break.
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
About to be a 4Loko vomit fountain in 45 seconds, what color will it be? Animated birds will fly out of me.
Seriously, this apartment is covered in body glitter. This chick musta been a huuuuuge slut. How do you get it across every surface?
Do you have any forwarding contact info?
You gotta start bringing a flask to work so you can get a head start
Possibly a very genius or very terrible idea...
Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
Didn't you used to babysit him?
18 years ago I helped him into his clothes. Today he helped me out of mine.
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
He skipped an important family function with his dying father to fuck me. Terrible human, amazing fuck buddy.
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
She's like the sister I never had that I want to bang.
Wanna meet at the diner for breakfast? all I've eaten in the past 24 hours is glitter and penis. starvingg.
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