You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
We just followed a woman home because she looked like Jeff Goldblum. Turns out she lives in a trailer park.
but really, i care about skinny girls as much as michael vick cares about rotweilers
I just put a tampon in while driving. Don't tell me I don't got skills.
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
I guess I tried to show you how big my closet was and we ended up eating pickles in my bathroom
Just beat off to internet porn while talking to my mom on the phone and eating a cinnamon roll. U have 5 minutes to get on my level
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
you slapped the bag of goldfish out of her hands and screamed, "BITCH THIS AINT NO AQUARIUM". That's how fucked up
Oh wow and I have a bunch of portable wine glasses called to go coffee cups
After he finished he laid there and told me how much work that just was. I looked at him and told him not to ruin a good thing by opening his mouth.
I went to a party last night....I stole all of their ornaments and the toaster oven.
Randomize
