On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
Walk of Shame time yet?
Dude she's 6"2, blonde and on the cheerleading team. I look like Seth Rogen's fatter, unfunny brother. What shame am I supposed to be feeling?
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
i sound like a 75 year old homeless man that has spent all his panhandling money on cigarettes since he was 12. that rough.
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
You what they say. One dick in the hand is better than two in the bush
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
look, bitch. one day when everyone i care about deserts me for my severe moral depravity, you're going to be the only one i have.
i can't wait.
Randomize
